


You Have No Idea

by safebannie



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Gen, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, I Don't Even Know, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Protective Hatake Kakashi, Sad Uzumaki Naruto, Suicide Attempt, Tags May Change, i hate sasuke and im not ashamed, ill change it later maybe, im not sure if it is, slightly sakura bashing?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 06:01:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24390073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/safebannie/pseuds/safebannie
Summary: Sakura says the wrong thing at the wrong time.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi & Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 17
Kudos: 244





	You Have No Idea

**Author's Note:**

> i literally have this saved as 'bashing the banshee' on docs  
> lmao i posted fluff yesterday and now its angst  
> also this isnt proofread yeehee

The remnants of Team 7 sit in a stilted silence in the dim hospital room, faces dark and the atmosphere heavy. All of a sudden, the pink-haired girl abruptly stands, tears coursing down her flushed cheeks, staring defiantly at the two males in the room.

Her voice was hoarse as she choked, “I hate you.”

The blond is rooted to his spot on the bed, fists clenched while the older man snapped his eyes to the girl. He tries to placate the situation.

“Now, Sakura I’m sure you don’t mean that––”

Sakura laughs hysterically. “How the _fuck_ would you know how I feel, huh, Sensei? I’m just stupid, useless Sakura aren’t I? How would you know how I feel?! He’s gone! Sasuke-kun is GONE because of _you_ Naruto! _ITS ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT!”_

The tiniest sob leaves the small boy, and Sakura doesn’t even hear it, the sound drowned out by her hateful screaming.

_“Sakura.”_ Kakashi raises his voice sharply, a warning in his tone. The girl ignores it and continues.

“How does it feel, Naruto? Being the reason the last Uchiha left Konoha? _You_ took the love of my life away from me!”

“Sakura––”

“You _promised_ to bring him back, didn’t you? So where the fuck is he?”

“SAKURA.” Kakashi is fuming by now, his voice dangerously low. Still, the heartbroken girl pays no heed to him and manages to speak just before she is forcibly silenced.

She huffs, her voice cracking, now a low murmur. “You know Naruto, I might as well just kill myself right about now,” she laughs humourlessly. “You knew how much he meant to me and yet––”

Kakashi has had enough, and, mindful of the crying blond boy, knocks the girl unconscious with a strike to the back of the neck. He swiftly carries her out and leaves her on one of the seats outside before speeding back into the room and pulling the boy into his chest, letting him sob while murmuring reassurances to him.

He would be having words with his pink student, he thought harshly. She wouldn’t be getting out of this one. Those were the wrong, _wrong_ words to say.

He pulls the boy on his lap and cradles him to his chest.

* * *

_Inu-san is here again,_ Naruto thought dully. His body felt heavy, as it had since he could remember. Inu-san sometimes came in to cook him food. He thought it was kinda strange, ‘ttebayo that Inu-san always turned up on the fourth or fifth day that he didn’t eat. Some person who delivered his food must have forgotten.

He knew that he needed food to survive, but did he really need to do that anyway? It was tiring, living. What was the point of doing that when there was nothing to live for? In all his four years of life, not a single person, save for Jiji, honestly cared, and Jiji had a whole village to care for so nobody would really miss him.

Inu-san probably didn’t care either. He wore that uniform that super secret ninja wore that always followed him around, so it was probably only a mission. Inu-san never talked to him anyway, only answering questions that he asked occasionally if he was feeling nice.

Maybe if he wasn’t living anymore he would meet his parents? Jiji said that they weren’t living anymore so he would go to the same place as them if he wasn’t either, right? He let his mind wonder dreamily, into his makeshift world where he had a mom and a dad who loved him like all the other kids did, where he had lots and lots of people who liked him and the kids played with him instead of calling him monster and all those other mean things. How cool was that, ‘ttebayo?!

Sometimes he became sad, when the villagers threw things at him or yelled at him or called him a ‘fucking demon’, whatever that means. And he would be sad too, when nobody came to pick him up from the park, or when he was all alone in his apartment with no one to talk to. He tried not to be, really, but what else could he do to make people like him?

Nothing much, he eventually realized.

He really wanted to meet his Tou-san and Kaa-san though. But what’s the fastest way to stop living?

It hurt a lot, when the lady down the hall kicked him down the stairs for taking too long to get down, and he kind of went to sleep for a while when that happened, so maybe if he just fell straight down he would sleep forever? That's what Jiji said happened to people who weren’t living anymore. They just went to sleep forever.

So Naruto decided to ask Inu-san, just to be sure it would work.

“Ne, Inu-san. What would happen if I fell down here?” he pointed to the open window from his spot from the windowsill.

Inu-san cocked his head to the side and kept on cooking. “You would die, of course.” No use lying to the kid.

“Is that like sleeping forever?”

“I guess so, Naruto-kun, it is.”

Naruto gave a big grin, nodded an okay and let himself topple forward.

Kakashi’s eyes widened behind his mask, and he had less than quarter of a second to not think before he was dropping the pan and bolting down the side of the building. He managed to catch the smiling child two thirds of the way down and desperately clutched him to his chest with his heart pounding harder and faster than it was allowed to.

_Oh Kami._

He hugged the small child who opened his eyes in confusion and quickly made his way back into the apartment window. _On the sixth floor._

He put as much distance between the now closed window and the child clutched to his chest as possible, quickly setting him down and turning off the stove, before plopping down on the floor and scooping the boy back into his arms. His heart has yet to calm down, and he rips off the porcelain mask and buries his head into the blond hair, too shocked to notice the tears prickling at the corners of his eyes.

“Inu-san?” Naruto asks quietly.

“Where’s my Tou-san and Kaa-san?”

Kakashi’s heart breaks into pieces as he listens to the boy’s small, questioning tone, understanding dawning on him.

* * *

Kakashi is suddenly remembering that time Naruto tried jumping out the window when he was part of his ANBU guard.

He shakes his head to get rid of those memories of panic and fear and lays the sleeping boy back down. His eyes hardened as he thought about his other student, the one lying unconscious on a bench outside.

The silver-haired man clenches his fists and wills himself to not murder the girl the moment he steps outside. How dare she speak of ending her life when she knew of no true pain? She’s lived a sheltered life, having the luxury of kind and loving parents, friends and a silly little crush––who had no hope of returning her feelings. Sasuke was a traitor now, who defected to another missing-nin and she was still willing to die for him? Stupid girl, she didn’t know batshit!

He breathed deeply to calm himself. He needed to be strict, unforgiving. He had a student to teach.

Sakura woke up on a green field, hazily sitting up. Then, she froze in place with fear coursing through her body, telling her to _run and run now you’re going to die go go GO––_

The strongest wave of killing intent had ever experienced in her short, stupid, useless life–– _calm down Kakashi_ ––died out, finally letting her move to fumble around for a second before she was abruptly picked up and tossed back into a wooden post. The same wooden post her blond teammate was tied to––

“Sakura.” she whipped her head up and caught sight of her sensei standing tall, intimidatingly looming over her and casting a dark shadow on her face.

“Sensei––” she tried.

“Silence, you stupid girl.” she failed.

Kakashi was _furious,_ that was for sure. The pink head gulped and nodded frantically. She had never see her laidback sensei so unbelievably angry before. She had a feeling if it weren’t for the law that stated that murder between allies was illegal, she would already be dead.

“You will listen, and you will not speak until I am finished. Do you understand me?” his voice was dangerous, and he was visibly holding back his KI, and even then, a minute amount was trickling out.

She whispered a small affirmative, and the KI spiked.

“I said,” he growled, _“do you understand me?”_

Sakura was suffocating and she gasped a ‘yes, sir’ before being able to breathe again.

“Good.” 

Kakashi wondered where to start. He settled for some reflection first.

“At the hospital,” he began calmly. “Do you remember what you said to Naruto?” Sakura nodded as anger flared in her heart.

“You said that and I quote, ‘I might as well kill myself right about now’, did you not?” his tone was normal, as if he was just talking about the weather.

His voice sharpened. “You will do no such thing of the sort, am I clear? You have no valid _reason_ to do so, idiot girl. Why would you kill yourself for such a stupid reason? Because Sasuke defected?” sarcasm laced his words, and Sakura found herself shrinking into herself.

“Sasuke defecting should have absolutely no relation to you wanting to end it all. You claim that he’s the so-called love of your life, but what exactly has he done to deserve that? What exactly do you see in him? His looks? His talent? His clan? His last name?” kakashi took a deep breath.

“Those reasons are all bullshit, Sakura and you know it. And you and I know full well that you have no desire to kill yourself at all. Nothing in” your short life gives you the excuse to do so and it would bring shame upon all that knew you if you were to do such a thing for such a reason. I will _not_ repeat myself, Sasuke leaving is _not_ a reason to commit suicide.

“You have no right to say to Naruto that it was his fault the Uchiha left, because you know it wasn’t. You have no right to say that he did not do his best, and you have _no right to say that you will kill yourself when you have done nothing to stop him in the first place.”_

Kakashi was positively seething, and his pink student went red and cowered away from his deathly glare, shame seeping into her posture.

“You have no idea what Naruto and his squad members went through to get Sasuke back, and you have no idea what Naruto has gone through in his life to say everything you did and what you didn’t. Sasuke lost his clan and his seeking revenge. How exactly do you think you would have understood him at all? Did you think by pining over him for so long would make him cave and crown you Mrs. Uchiha?” he sneered.

“And Naruto––” he inhaled deeply. “Kami, Naruto’s life was even worse. You do not speak of wanting to commit suicide in front of him because of such a _stupid fucking reason!”_

“Naruto had no family, Sakura. Did you know, _Sakura,_ that your teammate had nearly every person in the village hating him from the moment they knew of his existence? Did you know that he would spend days at a time with no money and no food, left to starve to death?”

Sakura was beginning to understand what Kakashi was talking about. Her parents always warned her about Naruto, never to get close. All the older generation glared at him as he walked by, even when he wasn’t doing anything, and she noticed the sheer hate in their eyes but she had never bothered to ask _why._ The next thing she heard made her want to vomit, made shame spread through her entire body and soul.

_“Did you know, Sakura, that Naruto has been on suicide watch since he was four years old?”_


End file.
